Thursday, July 19, 2012

Fighting From the Moment they Wake Up

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Each stage of motherhood has its own blessings and awesomeness. Each stage also has its challenges. Right now one of my biggest challenges is fighting. Starts in the morning. Ends in the never. Do your kids put up blockades of cereal boxes so they don't have to look at each other? Do they fight over who gets to look at the cereal boxes? Do they complain that someone is looking at them? Do they whine that a sibling is chewing with their mouth open? Sad thing is, I remember this very same action happening with my brothers. Cereal box fights were common. My poor mother. 

Any tips to reduce or eliminate breakfast fighting? And you can't answer "Get rid of the boxes." It doesn't matter what's for breakfast . . . 


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7 comments:

Emily said...

I make my kids hug it out when they fight and fight. If they continue to fight, they continue to sit and hug each other even longer. I start with 10 minutes and make it longer, much longer if I have to! :) It's such torture, but they do get over it.

Kristen said...

Mine are 2 and 3 and they fight constantly. I separate them, and just as the tantrums are done and they reunite, somebody takes something sombody else wanted. It's about killing me these days. And I feel like I see no end in sight. So I'm not thrilled to read about your kids doing this a few years down the road! Ugh!

GunDiva said...

Ear plugs. Then you don't have to listen to it. :)

My mom would make us sit on opposite ends of the couch and not look at each other, not talk to each other, and not move. Nothing bonds siblings like mutual anger for a parent. Trust me on this.

Melinda said...

I am so glad to hear mine aren't the only two that fight. I constantly tell them they are brother and sister and need to love one another...it doesn't work. I just tell them not to touch, look, or have anythign to do with one another and if they do they are both getting spankings...i know i'm pathetic.

Knit and Purl Mama said...

My oldest 2 (5 and a half and 4) fight all.the.time. I'm ready to pull my hair out. They fight over everything. What to put on TV (Uhm, dudes, we have more than 1 tv, someone go use another one), to what they play on the Xbox, or Wii. "If you don't like what your brother is playing on the wii, go use the f-ing xbox".... It never ends. They fight over toys. They fight over who gets to use something first. "But I wanted the black marker". Now I know why I started buying things in 2. Soon it will be 3 once my 19 month old joins in their fights.

They haven't yet pulled the cereal box to block seeing their sibling thing on us yet. I see it coming though. My mom and her brother used to put masking tape down the table so they didn't cross over onto the other person's space. I hope it doesn't result in that in my house.

I like GunDiva's suggestion. I think I'm going to buy earplugs. It might save the hair on my head.

Kristen said...

Oh man. Same here. 7 year old and 3 year old. Its constant! A couple things are sometimes successful. 1. Rewarding the older one for a better response since he is more mature and can understand. Instead of punishing for bad. 2. My awesome aunt suggested breaking into song and dance when they start fighting, just to throw them off and it keeps you from admitting yourself to the crazy house.

~robin said...

So I didn't make this up myself, so I can't take the credit for any therapy my kids will surely need down the road as a result of this idea, but when my two oldest were like 6 and 7 years old and would yell and fight I took them outside and told them if they were gonna shout at each other they had to do it outside and they had to yell what I told them to yell. I stood them each on opposite sides of the street and instructed them to shout at the top of their lungs: "I LOVE YOU. YOU ARE MY BEST FRIEND."

Incidentally, they were horrified and embarassed that anyone may see or hear them.

(It was more effective initially than it is no. Now I am dealing more with eye-rolls and the eye-roll-attitude.)

I got this idea from Lisa Whelchel's book, "Creative Correction." This book still holds a spot on my bookshelf.