Sunday, March 29, 2009

DMV Chicken Delivery and Formula One Racing

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Yesterday we packed up the fam into the DMV and headed for Roseville to have a slumber party at the Sanchez (formerly Sara Neft, my friend since 5th grade) house. The occasion? To watch the first Formula One Race of the season. Yes, you read that right - Formula One. Me and Shiloh like it. And the Sanchez' and the Yamashitas (they came too). Yes, you read that right - eight kids ages five and under sleeping(?) under one roof for the night. We are in a fantasy league together. Yes, you read that right - there is Fantasy Formula One. We haven't had cable TV for about 6 months so we decided to use that as an excuse to party in Roseville. Yes, you read that right - no TV. Not one channel. Don't believe in it. That's a lie. Just trimming the budget.
How do you think I have time to blog these days?

Anyway, we had a great time and the Sanchez's are wonderful, clean hosts.
In fact, I was lucky to be invited to their house after they saw my DMV. Seriously, these people are "the other kind." Their cars and their house are immaculate. All the time.
Within seconds of walking into their house, my kids took care of that problem. Here are some pics to give you an idea of what I am talking about.




They do have two young children so I am not really sure where they put them or what they do with him to maintain this kind of...lifestyle. But I'm pretty sure it's gotta involve duct tape.

Dave was the first to share his disgust, I mean, lack of understanding regarding my less than tidy minivan. He said he had some comments for the blog, but he wasn't sure they were appropriate. I told him to "bring it".
Here is what Dave would have commented if he had the guts. Yes, your read that right - Dave, I just called you a sissy.

"If you're not going to vaccinate you might want to clean out your van."
Ha, ha, ha. I didn't know you could get polio from a few extra jackets and an old apple slice! Maybe in Roseville.
"What about taking care of your van for good stewardship?" (In laymen's terms - why don't you take care of the things God has given you?)
My DMV is my good stewardship. It represents the love I have for my children. (At least that is what I keep telling myself as Elijah's "artwork" and "projects" from church and preschool build up on the passenger seat.)
Then Sara piped in, "Do you ever vacuum your car?"
What's the point when it gets messed up again as soon as I allow humans to ride in it? It's like swimming upstream all the time. I'd rather just float.

Not that I was intimidating by these OCDers, but I did have my DMV cleaned today.
Cleaned that sucker inside and out.
Sara, I actually do vacuum my car... about once or twice a year. It just happened to be that time. And it feels so good. And so right. And so temporary.
But now that it has had its yearly cleaning, I am turning over a new leaf. Not only am I banishing food in the car (is that even possible?), I am no longer allowing any children in my car. They have two feet, a bike and a trike. Time to use them.

Don't get me wrong, I like being in clean, clutter free houses and cars. I just can't figure out how to make that happen in my own life. I would love for all my OCD friends to come over and OCD my DMV and OCD my house everyday. But I think they're busy.

After we got back from Roseville, I personally delivered the coveted grand prize for the DMV contest to Melissa. She was thrilled, overjoyed, speechless. Her entire family came into town to see her accept her trophy which she immediately displayed proudly on her mantle.


I also gave her some delicious cinnamon rolls made by the Sanchez'. I think they will die when they read this post knowing that they unintentionally rewarded this unacceptable behavior. I sure hope Melissa enjoys those rolls.

Here is her reaction to her big win:

Incidentally, Melissa and I fought over the tupperware the cinnamon rolls came in. Neither of us wanted it. I left the rolls and bolted out the door as soon as I could as we all know where that tupperware would end up... for a long time.
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6 comments:

Amy said...

how do people LIVE like that?????

Lorri said...

you.crack.me.up.

I'm glad the chicken finally has a place of honor instead of being tossed among the car trash.

Love ya!

mel said...

kate tried to give the dog the chicken, luckily I was there & saved it. and, the cinnamon rolls were delicious :)

sara said...

Dear DMV'rs and other non-OCD'rs, this is Dave (aka Sissy), I would first like to say it was beyond SWEET to have the entire Hagen and Yamashita group to our sterile home (and I mean that in more than one way, I'm sorry, TMI on my part). These are wonderful people, I am blessed to know them, and fortunate to call them my friends which all added to the SWEETness. You see, my pride as an OCD type heightens when I have guests over to share my pride and joy...."the tranquility of clean." I wait to see if my guests will pick up on how my vacuum lines run perpendicular to the hardwood floor, how the faint smell of pinesol blends with the pop of windex, or the way my kids shake in fear when they drop a crumb of organic whole wheat bread onto a freshly ZEPd (*a brand of floor cleaner for you non-OCD'rs) floor. You see, this is more than a way of life, it is a disease. A disease that I fully endorse! So yes I did grimace in disgust when I read your DMV blog, and it got worse when I saw that others acknowledged such behavior as "norm" and then bragged on how they could one-up ya. I did the only thing I could do after that...I called for an intervention. You see, you may not have recognized it as one, but your 20hr stay was indeed an intervention (with a F1 break). It wasn’t by mistake that you camped out in my office. The secret is, the iPod docking station was softly playing “the Joy of Cleaning” while you slept. And the cinnamon roles, laced with OCD pollen....sorry! You could only imagine my joy to see pics of your car being cleaned and you handing the left over cinnamon rolls over to a prideful DMV’r as my plans were beginning to work. The only issue I have now is how I may have some responsibility in your negligence of abiding the child labor laws (car wash). Give me a call when you find yourself browsing the cleaning isle for new and improved cleaning tools versus the SPA brochure for your next relaxing vacation...

Wendy, Totally Desperate Mom said...

Dear Sissy,
I don't really have time to respond right now because I am cleaning out my fridge and organizing my linen closet. And I gotta take the vacuum away from the kids and get them into bed. But just so you know, Your magic spell did NOT work on me!

Denise said...

I actually remember that Sara chick from 5th grade! I'm proud of you for admitting your non-OCD issues in such a public forum:)