Sunday, February 21, 2010

Blog Bridesmaids Part 2

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In response to a comment on my Blog Bridesmaid post . . .
Tegan commented:
It's all about the reason you blog, I guess. Do you do it to get followers? Do you do it to have a creative outlet? Are you too lazy to scrapbook and find uploading pictures to a site that is already decorated for you easier?

I love to write. Blogging is a way of scrapbooking for my family (and humiliating them in the future?) and my creative outlet. It is also cheap therapy for me. However, there is an entertainer in me who likes an audience. When I was a kid I was called a "pig." Or maybe it was "ham." So although I don't blog for others, I do enjoy feedback and interaction from my bridesmaids. Who doesn't? Raise your hand if you don't like readers/comments on your blog.

I guess the questions I sometimes wrestle with are--How much do I let that (the enjoyment of feedback) influence what I write? How much do I care about having bridesmaids or wedding attendees (comments)? Am I seeking the approval of people to fill an unmet need from my childhood? (Sorry, I had to add that last question just in case Dr. Phil is reading this.)

When I first started blogging 100 years ago, I posted sporadically and it was a way to update my friends and family and to chronicle milestones and craziness in our lives. I have always enjoyed writing, but got away from it when my brain turned to mush I had kids.

A friend suggested I post about my Hollywood stuff because she thought it was fun to read about and that others would enjoy it too. Whether people are actually interested in it, I'm not convinced. I don't tend to get much feedback on those posts. I thought about not doing those posts anymore because of it. But then I go back to that question: "Am I doing it to get more bridesmaids or to please my current bridesmaids or my guest book ladies (RSS peeps)? Am I blogging for wedding party feedback?" And the answer is no. I actually enjoy going through my old Hollywood photos and thinking about those times. I had a wonderful experience in Hollywood and so it is fun for me to walk down memory lane. And I think my kids will enjoy reading about my experiences one day . . . probably more than reading about when they finger painted with poop or cried when dad's fart smelled so bad.

But to complicate this follower/feedback/wedding party topic even more--I just wrote a book. A book that I am self-publishing, which means a few things:
1. The book can be poorly written and totally suck. (Anyone can self publish.)
2. I'm paying for this book.

I have worked hard (and with a great editor/coach) to make #1 not be true.
But because I am self publishing, I am the one who has to market/sell the book. So now I have to be somewhat self/book-promoting. Ugh. I need to garner interest in my book and my blog is a way to do that. So I am trying to find that balance.

I'm already selfish and self-consumed enough. I don't want to be so concerned about my blog and and how many hits I am getting. I don't want to read a bunch of books about social media and then follow the twelve-step program to get more people to read my blog. Because then I'd likely have to go to a twelve-step program to get my off of my own blog addiction. Social media is enough of a vortex and I am praying and battling about my time spent in it.

I don't want my blog to turn into an advertisement. I don't want to promote consumerism. Not that I am against "sponsors" or giving away some free junk, I mean precious commodities, from time to time. I guess it's just finding that balance.

Clearly, I did not find that balance in this pic. If you have a photo with your bridesmaids in a lamer pose, please email it to me.

Ultimately I don't want to sell my book just to break even or make a few bucks. The goal of my book is to really encourage women in their motherhood journey and to make them seriously laugh. I also want to challenge and encourage women in their faith, but I don't want to isolate people who are not followers of Jesus. I seek to be true to my faith and honoring to God, but I try not to be too "preachy" both in my blog and in the book.

Am getting off topic here or what? What is the topic? This post has become way too long. So if you are still reading . . . I guess what I am trying to say is that I really like dark chocolate and Persian food. Also, when my book comes out I will look to my bridesmaids to help get the word out about it. That is, of course, only if my bridesmaids actually
1. Buy the book. 2. Read the book.
3. Like the book.

This week I will post another excerpt from the book so you can see if #2 is gonna happen.

P.S. Do any of my blog bridesmaids want to take me out on a scavenger hunt and force me to wear a funny outfit and moon boots?
And for the few male blog bridesmaids I have . . . hello and sorry for calling you a bridesmaid. But I know you're man enough to handle it and I know you've always dreamed of being a bridesmaid anyway.

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9 comments:

Amy said...

well since I am the friend who suggested you write about your hollywood days, you already know I enjoy reading about it =)

I think you could write about anything and make it entertaining. That's why I can't wait to read the rest of your book (and feel privileged that I got a sneak peak at a good portion of it).

Proud to be a bridesmaid. If I become your #1 reader/commentor does that make me the matron of honor??????

MOM: UNPROCESSED said...

that was my favorite post of yours.

Brian said...

2 Questions.

1. Am I allowed to read your book?
2. Do I have to wear a dress?

B

Tegan and Tage said...

I agree with Amy that you could write about anything and make it entertaining. The hilarity of motherhood combined with your writing style and the foundation of your faith is going to make for a great book. Can't wait to read it!

lilhoek said...

Okay- as I grew up in the days of Kirk and Mark-Paul, I LURV reading the Confessions... That is what drew me in. Your faith and mothering have kept me reading and laughing. I know you probably didnt write this as a "feed my ego, bridesmaids!" type post, but you bring a little brightness to a day of missing my little one at home while I work. Thanks!

TDM Wendy said...

Amy,
You can be my matron of honor. Will you give a toast at the wedding?

Kate,
Thanks. Glad you liked it and could follow it since it was so all over the place.

Brian,
1. Permission granted because you are a dad and have known me for over 20 years. You're in the club.
2. You don't have to wear a dress. Just capris.

Tegan,
Thanks.

lilhoek,
Thank you for coming out of the wedding party closet and almost admitting that you read Teenbeat magazine. I am honored to bring brightness to your day. That is cool.

mel @ the larson lingo said...

I LOVE reading about your Hollywood Days, especially because we grew up in the same town & I watched Lassie. It is fun to hear the behind the scenes stuff from the Hollywood Days & all the fun people you met!
I also can't WAIT for your book to come out & like Amy, I feel privileged to have already read a good chunk of it.
I am honored to be one of your blog bridesmaids & I look forward to throwing you a "blog bridal shower" when your book comes out :)

TDM Wendy said...

Mel,
What a great idea! I'm going to register at The Cheesecake Factory and The Coffee Bean!

Stephanie @ The Helping Mommy said...

Soooo sorry Wendy, I've been shirking on my blog-stalking duties.
Was going to subscribe as a follower since I love your posts so much, but would that just be jumping on the bridesmaid bandwagon? I'm so conflicted!

Please don't stop writing about your Hollywood days. I love reading your stories. I know it sometimes feels like you're talking to yourself when people don't post a comment, but know that we're here reading it, loving it, and having so much fun at the wedding that sometimes we forget to sign the guestbook. 'Kay?